Listening for Understanding
December 2023 Communication
Communicating is not easy at times, and that's when dementia is not even on the radar. Disagreements, confusion, clumsy expression are all ways our ability to communicate can be compromised. But communication is a two-way street. It takes more than our own 'words' to be effective. It takes the ability of someone to not only 'hear' the words, but the ability to listen and understand. Read More…
Living Out the Christian Faith
November 2023 Faith
The Hebrew and Christian scriptures are full of people doing wrong and misunderstanding. Throughout history people have failed. In the Book of Amos, written close to 3000 years ago, we hear that the people have failed, they have done wrong by God. In 1 Kings we learn Solomon, in all his wisdom, also failed God, and in the Psalms, we hear that the people are feeling God’s anger again because of faithlessness (Psalm 85). All these texts were written around 2500 years ago. But in the Book of Ezekiel, also written around 585 BCE, we hear about the God of second chances.
We all continue to fail, and the Christian scriptures attest to the failure of the disciples in many cases. We all fail in so many ways, in knowing what to say, or how to say it, or in the actions we take or don’t take, and by generally misunderstanding, I know I have. I have failed to live out my Christian faith at times. Yet the Christian scriptures can help us out. As we turn to the God of multiple chances, who wants the best for us, we can learn how we can do better, providing us with a template on how to communicate. Read More…
Finding Peace
May 2023 Faith
There once was a man who was nearly out of money. He went from job site to job site searching for work, but no matter how hard he tried no-one would hire him. Then one day, when he was nearly at his wits end, he walked into a pub and sat down. He decided to buy himself a pint, something he hadn't done in a very long time. Read More…
Dementia as Pilgrimage
March 2023 Communication | Faith
"Take up your staff and follow me."
From Moses to Jesus we have been implored to pick up our staff and follow. The prophets before Jesus, then Jesus himself, urged us to bear witness. So too can any person living with an advancing dementia say, "Take up your staff and follow me."
Dementia can teach us much - all of us - those living with a condition and those not at the moment. It is not new to believe that dementia can teach us. But each person's travels will be different. Where the person living with the dementia leads will take each of us down a different, although possibly similar, path. But the lessons will be unique. So let's reframe dementia into a pilgrimage. A journey into the spiritual, where we find a connection with the Other. Read More…
From Moses to Jesus we have been implored to pick up our staff and follow. The prophets before Jesus, then Jesus himself, urged us to bear witness. So too can any person living with an advancing dementia say, "Take up your staff and follow me."
Dementia can teach us much - all of us - those living with a condition and those not at the moment. It is not new to believe that dementia can teach us. But each person's travels will be different. Where the person living with the dementia leads will take each of us down a different, although possibly similar, path. But the lessons will be unique. So let's reframe dementia into a pilgrimage. A journey into the spiritual, where we find a connection with the Other. Read More…
The Snowball Effect of Dementia
December 2022 Communication
Dementia ricochets throughout our relationships, and throughout the social network. It is not only the person who is living with the condition who is affected, but family and friends, work colleagues, and many others. Dementia truly does have a snowball effect. Conflict and discord can escalate where conflict and discord may have previously been manageable. Difficulties in relationships can emerge, which can actually create a barrier to connecting with the person now living with dementia.
Sometimes familial conflict can even seem insurmountable. I know, I speak from experience. Read More…
Sometimes familial conflict can even seem insurmountable. I know, I speak from experience. Read More…